Let's get one thing straight: I hate the hype cycle. I'm offended by
all of the manipulative things which large corporations do to convince consumers to disregard rationality, common sense, and their own interests to buy absolute shit that they don't need, and probably wouldn't even want if they just thought about it for a second. It's like they're insulting our intelligence, insisting that we forget everything we know, and every shitty thing they've done to us, all so that we can mindlessly dump more money into their coffers for even less product, this time around.
Never believe the hype.
So, yes, I hate hype. This week, though, I'm learning new things about myself. I'm learning that, even more than the hype cycle itself, I hate
poorly-executed hype. It's as if, not satisfied with the insult to our intelligence, these companies now can't even be bothered to make it
look like they're trying. "Hype yourselves, suckers, and fuck you all," is the message they're sending, whether they intend to or not.
EA's E3 presser was shockingly incompetent, to such an extent that I don't even know what they were trying to achieve. Not to be out-done, though, Square Enix appear to have looked at that hype-less, lethargic mess, and decided to up the ante, as reported by Kotaku:
It’s 1:30am Eastern on a Sunday morning and Square Enix just announced Kingdom Hearts III’s release date, because why not? The long-awaited action-roleplaying game will be out on January 29, 2019, the publisher says.
[...]
Technically this is a delay—Square had previously said Kingdom Hearts III would be out in 2018—but at least there’s a firm date now? And at least they announced the news in the middle of the night on the weekend of E3, two days before THEIR OWN PRESS CONFERENCE. Never change, Square Enix.
Wow. I mean... really... damn. Just...
damn.
OK, I guess I can see the logic? Turning up at E3 to announce that the long-awaited game that you're supposed to be releasing this year won't actually be ready until next year would have been awkward, and bigfooting their own presser like this does obviate the need to show gameplay footage at the event itself. Since nobody's expecting
anything of Square Enix anymore, I suppose that this counts as one way to effectively manage expectations.
Still, though...
damn.
Having magnificently achieved the opposite of pre-show hype, Square Enix are now going to be playing to a tough room; they need to stage a show that blows everybody's minds, and based on the level of PR-fu they're showing so far, I have doubts about that happening. Last year's E3 was pretty lacklustre; this year's E3 is, if anything, off to an even worse start.